So, in honor of my friend Chrissy leaving (read escaping) the Ville, here’s another funny story for you.
Chrissy calls me up and tells me about this music fest/picnic thing going on in Falls Park. “There’s supposed to be bands, and families picnicking and hanging out. It should be fun.” Of course, seeing as I have nothing else to do, I happily acquiesce.
We agree to park at our respective work places, meet up and walk down to where all the “supposed” action is going down. As we’re strolling and chatting away, we start to notice that something is amiss. Where are all the people? Usually, when there’s something exciting happening in the Ville like a baseball game or a outdoor concert, parking is impossible due to the fair amount of people out and about. As we draw closer to Falls park, empty parking spaces abound. Not only that, there’s absolutely no one cruising up and down Main (normally packed with people trying to find parking spots). But, we shrug it off thinking that we’re possibly really early.
So, we’re walking and talking and all of sudden we start to hear music. And, for some reason, both of us immediately can tell by the docent tones wafting on the summer heat that it’s Contemporary Christian.
“What kind of music festival did you say this was again?” I asking turning to Chrissy.
“Uh, fun music?” she replies.
We decide to venture further in and sure enough it becomes clear that we’ve stumbled into a love God fest. Now, don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing wrong with a Christian music event. I’ve been to plenty in my lifetime. However, when you’re expecting something a little more, oh how should I put this, secular, it throws you off guard.
So, we’re trying to be cool, swaying back and forth to I Can Only Imagine (or something very similar) and overlooking the scene before us. A handful of people are gathered, some sitting on blankets, some up and playing with frisbees and what not. And then there’s this one group that seems to be attracting some attention. They’re all standing motionless, lined up and facing one direction. Me with my extensive dance team background immediately understood what was about to transpire.
A new song blasts over the sound system and they’re off. The first few moving slowly and rhythmically to the acoustic guitar and drum beat. Hands raised to heavens, bodies swaying back and forth, spinning and kneeling as if to pray. Over and over and over again.
Chrissy turns to me with a horrified look on her face. “What are they doing? It’s looks like there in some kind of trance.”
“Oh, not to worry,” I say. “They’re just praise dancing.” Look of confusion from Chrissy.
“It’s choreographed dance only to Contemporary Christian. It’s usually pretty good, but this is just-”
“Awful.” Chrissy finishes. I nod and we both continue watching this train wreck of kinetic energy. And then all of sudden, it’s all too much. Laughter creases our lips and soon smirking turns to giggling turns to full blown laughter. By the time the group really gets going, tears are rolling down our cheeks and we’re doubled over. Of course, people start looking at us wondering what the hell is so funny.
When I realized that we’re causing a scene, I grab Chrissy’s arm and we book it out of there still laughing hysterically. Moral of the story:
1. Always, always read the fine print on any event posting.
2. All Contemporary Christian music sounds the same. Chrissy and I discussed that at length. It seems to be the only genre of music that doesn’t evolve with the times. But, I guess when your subject matter is timeless, you can get away with that.
(Correction: This craziness was all my idea. I called her, not the other way around. But, it’s still really, really funny.)